Meikles & Dimes

125: Sundays with Tozer Episode 9 | Tozer and His Team at IBM Invent MR Technology

Justin Tozer is a math and science prodigy who grew up on a farm where formal education was all but prohibited. Yet, somehow Tozer would make his way to the world’s most prestigious firms, first in Silicon Valley and later in Los Alamos at the world’s preeminent scientific lab.

Yet no professional accomplishment compares to the countless lives Tozer has saved, changed, and enhanced.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• How Tozer and his team at IBM invented MR technology
• How Tozer is better at talking to a horse than a human

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124: Sundays with Tozer Episode 8 | Tozer Describes Youth He Mentored and Internships He Had

Justin Tozer is a math and science prodigy who grew up on a farm where formal education was all but prohibited. Yet, somehow Tozer would make his way to the world’s most prestigious firms, first in Silicon Valley and later in Los Alamos at the world’s preeminent scientific lab.

Yet no professional accomplishment compares to the countless lives Tozer has saved, changed, and enhanced.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• Two specific examples of youth he mentored
• The mental rules he uses to manage the stress of mentoring youth
• Internships he had while in college

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Twitter: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/

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123: The World’s Longest Study of Happiness | Professor Marc Schulz

Marc Schulz is the associate director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, an 85-year study of individuals and families. He is also the author of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.

Marc earned an undergraduate degree from Amherst College and a Ph.D. from California Berkeley.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• The Harvard Study of Adult Development has followed more than 2,000 people spanning more than 85 years. The one finding that stands out above all others: Relationships keep us happier and healthier through our lives.
•  Relationships help us navigate stress, overcome challenges, deal with emotions, figure out our path, and connect us with our past. Relationships are also where we experience our most joy, and they also predict our health and happiness.
• The risk of mortality associated with loneliness is about the same as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
• One of the biggest problems with loneliness is that it’s quite prevalent. In the United States, in a given week, 20-50% of adults report being lonely. Given that loneliness is as damaging to health as smoking 15 cigarettes/day, the surgeon general talks about this is a public health crisis.
• In the past, people had to get out of their house to see whether the Jones’s where better off than them. But now we can socially compare ourselves from our phones. And most of us come out of those comparisons feeling worse about ourselves.
• By going more virtual and focusing on efficiency we miss out on informal connections, like talking to people in the hallway.
• Just as physical fitness is important predictor of health and happiness, so too is social fitness. By thinking about our social lives in terms of what’s working, and then prioritizing our positive social relationships, we can improve our happiness.
• When people in their 80s discuss their regrets, most regrets are centered on relationships. For example, losing contact with friends, or not being as kind as they could have been to the people they loved.
• Social fitness is all about making time for our friends and loved ones. Eating lunch with them, going on walks with them, or calling them. As the key finding from the 85-year Harvard Study of Adult Development shows, relationships keep us happier and healthier through our lives.

 

Follow Marc

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marc-schulz-20663222a/

Website: https://www.brynmawr.edu/inside/people/marc-schulz

The Good Life Book: https://amzn.to/41ShAe3

Follow Me:

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Website: https://natemeikle.com

122: Andy Reid, Head Coach Kansas City Chiefs | Leadership

Andy Reid is the head coach of the Kansas City Chiefs where he has won three Super Bowls. After the most recent championship, his two star players had this to say about Andy as a leader:

First Travis Kelce: “I got the greatest coach this game has ever seen. He's unbelievable at not only dialing up plays and having everybody prepared, but he's one of the best leaders of men that I've ever seen in my life. I owe my entire career to that guy. I just love him man.”

Second Patrick Mahomes: “I believe he is the best coach of all time. For me, he brings out the best in me because he lets me be me. He doesn’t try to make me anyone else. I don’t think I would be the quarterback that I am if I didn’t have coach Reid being my head coach.”

I can’t imagine two better endorsements of Andy and his leadership style. 

In this episode we discuss the following:

• When Andy thinks about the most important things he’s learned about leadership, he thinks about his role models, from church leaders to LaVell Edwards.
• What Andy especially loved about LaVell Edwards is that he was never out of control, he was honest, he was a good teacher, and he was consistent.
• Andy is so good at applying lessons learned from LaVell Edwards, for example, keeping control of his emotions when getting “bumped to the other side of the 50” by Travis Kelce in the Super Bowl.
• Andy is so good at applying lessons learned from LaVell Edwards. For example, committing to always be honest with his players because he doesn’t believe you can be a good teacher if you’re not honest.
• One of Andy’s greatest leadership strengths: He knows his players. He remembers that Chris Jones was wearing a red tuxedo 8 years ago when Chris didn’t get drafted in the first round. He knows that Travis Kelce is the oldest player on the team. He remembers drafting Kelce in his first year at Kansas City and has watched him grow up.
• Andy’s greatest leadership strength: He loves his players. Andy loves Travis Kelce for his passion, even when getting yelled at and bumped in the Super Bowl. Andy loved Travis for putting his body on the line every play and for wanting to give more.Andy loves Chris Jones for committing to do all he could do to win the Super Bowl, and then reaching deep into no man’s land to make it happen. Andy loves Patrick Mahomes coming into the huddle every day saying, “Let’s be great!”
• It’s important for leaders to be calm, honest, consistent, teachers. But I think Andy is one of the greatest of all time for two additional reasons: He knows his players and he loves them.

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Website: https://natemeikle.com

121: Yale Lecturer Zoe Chance on Reducing the Asking Gap

Zoe Chance, Yale lecturer and author of the international bestseller, INFLUENCE IS YOUR SUPERPOWER, studies persuasion, decision making, and how people can lead happier, healthier, more fulfilling lives.

At Yale, Zoe teaches one of Yale’s most popular classes, Mastering Influence and Persuasion. She also collaborates with Google and Optum Health. Prior to her engagement at Yale, Zoe marketed a $200 million segment of the Barbie brand at Mattel and developed an executive education leadership program at Harvard.

Her research has been covered in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Economist, Scientific American, Psychology Today, Financial Times, and Discover.

Zoe received her doctorate from Harvard, MBA from the University of Southern California, and bachelor’s degree from Haverford College.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• Those who had advantages were seven times more likely to ask for help than those who didn’t. But, if we help those who ask and don’t seek out and support those who don’t ask for help, we further perpetuate inequality.
• By developing policies with an eye towards helping those who are less likely to ask for help, we can help level the playing field.
• A lot of privilege in this world is a result of asking for help. But when we help those who ask for help, we can unintentionally perpetuate the Asking Gap, as we help those who already have more privilege.
• An employee who had just had a child was struggling to keep up with work. So, she asked to work remotely. The manager, being kind, agreed. But the two previous mothers who had just given birth, but hadn’t asked to work remotely, were short changed. So, the company created a policy allowing all mothers the same benefit.
• To reduce the Asking Gap, Zoe automatically grants a two-day extension to anyone who asks. All they have to do is send an email to an email address which automatically responds with the extension.

Follow Zoe

X: https://twitter.com/zoebchance

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/zoebchance/

Website: https://www.zoechance.com/

Book: INFLUENCE IS YOUR SUPERPOWER,

Follow Me:

X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle

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Website: https://natemeikle.com

120: NYU Professor Dolly Chugh on Bounded Ethicality

Dolly Chugh is an award-winning psychologist at New York University. She studies how and why most of us, however well-intended, are still prone to race and gender bias, as well as what she calls “bounded ethicality.”

Dolly’s work has been covered on the TODAY Show, the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, the Atlantic, The goop Podcast, NPR, Dr. Phil, and other media outlets. And Dolly’s TED Talk was named one of the 25 Most Popular TED Talks of 2018 and currently has more than 5 million views.

Prior to becoming an academic, Dolly worked at Morgan Stanley, Merrill Lynch, and Time Inc. Dolly earned a psychology and economics degree from Cornell University and an MBA, M.A. and PhD from Harvard.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• Just as our brains are limited in how quickly they can process and store information (bounded rationality), our brains are also limited when it comes to ethical decision making (bounded ethicality).
• By using systems, we can safeguard ourselves against some of our biases. So, for example, rather than just hiring for fit, and possibly perpetuating inequality, we can formalize the hiring system and hire for behavioral competencies.
• Just as we need financial literacy to understand finance and how to invest, we also need psychological literacy to understand ethics and how to behave ethically.

Follow Dolly:

Website: https://www.dollychugh.com/

X: https://twitter.com/DollyChugh

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dolly-chugh/

Book: https://amzn.to/4aPkPHh

Follow Me:

X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/

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119: Stanford Professor Bob Sutton | The Best Leaders Are Trustees of Others’ Time

Bob Sutton, Professor at Stanford University, is a New York Times bestselling author of 9 books including his most recent, with co-author Huggy Rao, titled The Friction Project. Bob co-founded Stanford’s Center for Work, Technology, and Organization, the Stanford Technology Ventures Program, and the “d school.” Bob has served as an advisor to McKinsey, Bain, and Microsoft, as a Fellow at IDEO, and as faculty at the World Economic Forum, and he is currently a Senior Scientist at Gallup.

Bob has given keynote speeches to more than 200 groups in more than 20 countries and has been a guest on numerous radio and television shows, including ABC, Bloomberg, BBC, CNBC, Fox, NBC Today Show, PBS, NPR, Marketplace, and CNN.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• The best leaders see themselves as trustees of other’s time. As Bob told his employer at Stanford, and even a Google executive yesterday, “If the California DMV can be trustees of our time, you can do it for your employees too.”
• At the CA DMV, Bob showed up at 7:30 am, and 60 people were in front of him. Bob was thrilled when he saw a worker walking each row passing out forms, prepping people for their visit, and re-routing those in the wrong line. This DMV hero was a trustee of other peoples’ time (and Bob was out in less than an hour).
• Our natural tendency is to add things to anything we do, whether it’s a recipe, a vacation, or our jobs. But when we switch to the subtraction mindset, we can vastly improve things.
• Switch to the subtraction mindset: In the state of Michigan there was a form that 2.5 million residents filled out that had 1,000 questions. But thanks to Project Reform, the form is now 80% shorter and takes half the time.
• Lead with love. Starting with love, and then building the logistics behind it, can lead to vastly improved experiences compared to starting with logistics. For example, when Netflix made it easy to cancel, they got much better data from their customers.

 

Follow Bob:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/work_matters

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bobsutton1/

Website: https://www.bobsutton.net/

Follow Me:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/

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118: Stanford Professor Huggy Rao | Remove Obstacles that Infuriate. Insert Obstacles that Educate.

Hayagreeva "Huggy" Rao, professor at Stanford University, is the author of several bestselling books, including his most recent, with co-author Bob Sutton, The Friction Project. His books have been covered in the Wall Street Journal, Financial Times, Inc. Magazine, Amazon, Forbes, and Washington Post among others.

Huggy has also consulted with organizations such as British Petroleum, CEMEX, General Electric, IBM, Mass Mutual, American Cancer Society, the FBI and CIA.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• Whether leaders are wasting others’ time or underestimating coordination problems, they are creating bad friction that leads people to say things like, “After pouring myself into my BS work each day, I only have scraps of myself for my family.”
• Not all friction is bad. Creating friction for the Oakland Police Department led to less African Americans and Latinos being unjustly stopped.
• A leader has two primary jobs: remove obstacles that infuriate. And insert obstacles that educate.

Follow Huggy

X: https://twitter.com/huggyrao

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hayagreevarao/

Website: https://huggyrao.com/

The Friction Project Book: https://amzn.to/48BVX3I

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Website: https://natemeikle.com

117: Dan Heath, Author of Made to Stick | Bright Spots as a Superpower

Dan Heath is the co-author, with his brother Chip, of four New York Times bestsellers: Decisive, Switch, Made to Stick, and The Power of Moments. Their books have sold over 3 million copies and been translated into 33 languages.

Dan is a Senior Fellow at Duke University’s CASE center, which supports social entrepreneurs. Previously, Dan worked as a researcher and case writer for Harvard Business School. In the late 1990s, Dan co-founded a publishing company called Thinkwell, which produces online college textbooks featuring video lectures from the country’s top professors. And one proud geeky moment for Dan was his victory in the 2005 New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest, beating out 13,000 other entrants.

Dan has an MBA from Harvard Business School and a BA from the University of Texas at Austin.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• We’re prone to focus on weakness and shortcomings. Almost 2/3 of emotion words are negative. When we write in journals, we tend to focus on what’s not working. But focusing on our bright spots can be superpower.
• We naturally assume that when there are problems we should spend our time focusing on the problems. But an alternative approach is to focus on strengths…the bright spots.
• It’s so easy to think, “What’s the problem and how do we fix it?” But another mode of inquiry that is every bit as powerful but rarely asked is “What's working today and how can we do more of that?”
• "Again and again in life you’re going to encounter situations with mixed signals. Our natural tendency is to dwell on what's not working, what's broken. But I want you to be the person that says 'Hang on a second, let's flip this and look at the other side of the spectrum. What are the bright spots?'”
• Dan is a serial procrastinator. But by focusing on his bright spots, analyzing when he was at his best, he realized that to be most productive he needed to spend his mornings writing in coffee shops.
• “One company in particular added an increment of about 9 digits of revenue just by studying their own best work.”

 

Follow Dan:

Website: https://heathbrothers.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dan-heath-aa5a63147/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/whatitsliketobepodcast/

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116: FBI Hostage Negotiator Chris Voss | Collaborative Beats Cutthroat

Chris Voss is a former Lead FBI Negotiator who debunks the biggest myths of negotiation. Chris has lectured on negotiation at business schools across the country and has been seen on ABC, CBS, CNN, and Fox News. Chris has also been featured in Forbes, Time, Fast Company, and Inc. Chris’s Keynotes are based on his book Never Split The Difference which has sold more than 3 million copies in 33 languages.

In this episode we discuss the following:

• For most negotiations use either a playful, upbeat tone or the “Late night FM DJ voice.” And smile.
• Oprah may be the greatest negotiator of all time. And people still like her. Collaboration beats cutthroat.
• Women pick up “tactical empathy” better than men. But also they are punished more than men for bad negotiating.
• Extreme anchors have the tendency of driving deals away from the table.
• If you routinely win “too big” in negotiations, people may stop dealing with you.
• Prepare people for bad news with phrases like, “You’re probably not going to like this…” This phrase is way better than, “Not to be rude…”
• Accusation Audit: Imagine the negative thoughts your counterparty has about you and proactively address them.
• Mirror Technique: Repeat that last 3-5 words of what somebody just said. This is often received much better than, “What do you mean?”
• Labeling Technique: After your counterparty speaks, label what they said by using phrases such as, “It seems like…” or “It sounds like…”
• Use no-oriented questions: “Have you got a few minutes to talk” can be changed to “Is now a bad time to talk?” “Can I have the day off?” can be changed to “Is it ridiculous to ask for tomorrow off?”
• When negotiating salary, first negotiate success: “How can I be guaranteed to be engaged in projects that are critical to our strategic future.”
• And Chris’s final message: You’re going to be more prosperous being collaborative than cutthroat.

 

Follow Chris:

Website: https://www.blackswanltd.com/

X: https://twitter.com/fbinegotiator

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christophervoss/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thefbinegotiator/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCk7jHqdlFFDBhC1QIFqi54w

Book: https://amzn.to/41zEcQj

Follow Me:

X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle

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